Why Are There So Many Songs About Rainbows…

Posted By Tempest

So, we’re watching Jeopardy tonight off the DVR (we’re rarely home when it actually airs).

Here’s the “answer” under the category Scientifically Related:
The order Perissodactyla Has 3 Families: Horses, Tapirs and  These Great Horned Beasts… 

What did you think of first?
Right! I said ‘Unicorn’ too!

And as I said it, Thunder spit out his hot chocolate.
I paused the DVR and looked at him.

“Is that not right?” I asked.

Thunder raises his eyebrow, shakes his head and says, “Nooooo. I don’t believe the answer is unicorn.”

“Hmmm,” I say. “I’m sticking with unicorn.”

Thunder says, “No! Everyone knows that unicorns are what girls fart.”


“Girls fart unicorns and rainbows; everyone knows that.”


“Uh…women? females? I don’t want to be insensitive here.”

“Insensitive? You don’t want to be insensitive, but you think I fart unicorns?”

Thunder points to the TV screen. The answer is “Rhinoceros,” for cryin’ out loud! Would you rather I thought you farted Rhinoceros…es? Rhinoceri? Whatever the plural is?”

Dora The Explorer Farts Unicorns and Rainbows

Dora The Explorer Farts Unicorns and Rainbows


And actually…he’s right. I DON’T want him to think of a rhinoceros when I fart.


So kiddies, when you’re looking for true love, it’s not about how much money he has, or how handsome he is, or what kind of car he drives.

It’s whether he thinks unicorns fly out of your butt after 20 years.

(I’m going to have to stitch that on a pillow.)

Nov 21st, 2014

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