Archive for August, 2015

Putting a “Mc” in Front of the Name Doesn’t Make It Food

Tempest -

Dear McDonalds Corporation, I find it unbelievable that no one in the New Product Naming meeting bothered to say this menu item’s name ALOUD! While our friends in the Midwest and the South might enunciate every letter perfectly and avoid this embarrassment, we here in the New York/NJ Metro area are not so eloquent. We […]

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Well…The Victory Lap IS Always At the End…

Tempest -

“To ‘Lapidate’ is to Kill Someone By This Means” This was the last question in the Double Jeopardy round tonight. I had an answer right away, and I shouted out before Thunder. It was not the right answer, but I never got to hear Thunder’s answer because he was on the floor laughing at mine. […]

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The Monkey Days of Summer

Tempest -

            I’ve just read that it’s illegal to offer whiskey or cigarettes to monkeys in NJ zoos. I guess I’ll have to plan something else for Tuesday.

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Screaming Down the Highway: A One-Act Play about Crotch Rockets

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Setting: Driving down Route 10 in Whippany, NJ. A fleet of leathered-up motorcycle boys and girls pass our dinky RAV4. Some riders are on Harleys, some on Hondas (I believe), two on a bike and sidecar setup, and one on a Can-Am. Tempest: OOOHH! Look – the forward trike. I want one of those. (approaching […]

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I’m Not Violating the Dog If It Saves Me $35, Right?

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Brinkley is a black Labrador Retriever.  This is his puppy picture. Very adorable, right?  Right. However, the maxim regarding Labs is “Watch Ears and Rears.”  Their ears get full of gunk that has to be cleaned out regularly.  Their rears also get full of…uh…gunk, of sorts. Specifically, their anal glands fill up and have to […]

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